THE CURIOUSLY STRONG MINTS...

::fROM mY sPEAKERS:: TANGERINE - LED ZEPPELIN

Have you ever wondered what would happen if Fred Penner ever continued his show. I myself ponder the idea from time to time. Eventually his back would go out while climbing through the log, paranoia and claustrophobia would set in, resulting in Penner screaming hysterically to his aids for help while on live TV. Or maybe his memory would go and he'd get lost in the woods, never to be seen alive again. A hunter would later find his remains scattered in a small clearing, no doubt as a result of scavengers and other small animals of the forest tearing his flesh apart to eat. Or, I could see him slipping on a rock and severely breaking his ankle. Gangrene would set in and again the hunter theory would apply. While on the subject of shows from our youth, did you know that Mr. Rogers had 9 cardigans, all of which were knitted by his mother! Fascinating to say the least.

I nearly threw my TV out the window last night. After Jeopardy! There was a NICK AND JESSICA VARIETY SHOW. And yes, I mean the dick from 98 Degrees and airhead-Simpson. I couldn't believe it. I didn't think TV producers could sink so low. And yet I watched it, every damn minute of it. I mean, what else am I gonna write about? Mr. Rogers? It was an hour of them covering songs, and plugging their own withering careers. The only thing entertaining about the show was that Mr. T was on it. I know, I was confused as hell too. I mean what the fuck, Mr. T, from the A-Team and T & T. His skit was "Ten Awkward seconds with Mr. T" he just stood there. I actually enjoyed that. Kitt the crime solving car from Knightrider, staring David Hasselhoff, was also on the show, singing a duet with Nick. I swear to fuck I'm not making this up...really.

My paycheck finally came last weekend. Just in time too. I was broke and considering auditioning for Bum Fights. Saturday I played my first soccer game in two years. We won 7-2 against Dooley's. Then Murph and I got hammed at his new apartment in the depths of Bayfield st. The plan was to drink at his place and then meet up with friends at either their apartment or at morons. Instead, we ended up stopping by Lyndsay and Ambers for like 2 hours and missed the bars completely. I can't recall a single conversation from the entire night. I can only remember taking a piss like every 3 mins. I'm pretty sure they weren't drinking and that I made an ass out of myself, but why break with routine. Murph and I headed back to his place sometime around two were I proceeded to fall asleep watching the first season of Kids in the Hall on DVD. Sunday I had another soccer game against Winsloe. Shannon was there, looking like a soccer mom, with a stroller in hand. We bet them 4-2 I think.

I spent a shitload of my money already. Here's what I got:
-New Aviators
-Led Zeppelin III
-Pearl Jam, Yield
-Blow (the book), Bruce Porter
-Stupid White men..., Michael Moore
-Solaris
-Reality Bytes 10th anniversary dvd.
-Ryan Adams, Rock'n Roll
-Punk-O-Rama 9
-Velvet Revolver, contraband
-Festival of Lights Pass

I haven't bought the Shoreline tickets yet, I'll save that for later today.

I'm out like Vanilla Ice.